Sunday, April 1, 2012

Half Done is Well Begun

“And that’s a new miracle of science. An invention for which the only parallel lies thousand years back in history, when man first set a foot on the moon.  Or perhaps the even bigger ladies and gentlemen.” Prof Fem Fermi  dramatized, justly so, on showcasing his greatest invention to the elite group of best scientists of the solar system, government officials belonging to top echelons of power and wealthiest industrialists who were expected to bid for his invention after the demonstration.

“Behold your senses as I present you the dream the mankind dreamt since ages forgotton – the teleportation machine” – Said Prof Fem as one of his assistants unfurled the silky red cover from his machine.

It looked like a big space-car to the untrained eye and the scientists alike and was a bit of anticlimax for them. Of course, they knew that the show wasn’t over yet.

Prof Fem continued – “This teleportation machine ladies and gentlemen will change the way the humanity progresses. Let me ask a simple question to you my dear Senator Grechen. How long did it take you to come to Pluto for this demonstration?”

Senator Grechen was not amused, but he played along answering such a dumb question –“ Earth to Pluto is 8 light hours my dear friend. And I am the privileged to use the new C-fiftys. So that took 16 hours plus a few more at the surface.”

“And what if I were to tell you that from this moment onwards that will take just an instant?” – said Prof Fem Fermi smilingly, knowing that he had captured the fantasy of everyone sitting there.

“Then Spacester Corp. is willing to pay you the twice your basic bid amount Prof Fermi” – said Mooney - chairman of one of the largest transportation companies in the solar system

“Well, thanks for your patronage Mr Mooney, but after the demonstration I am quite sure that you’ll realize that base bidding price of 1 trillion credits is a gross underestimate for the value of this machine.”

“Well then, get over with this already. I have already waited so much and have other matters to attend to” – said another business tycoon while puffing his martian cigar

“Ok then Ladies and Gentlemen. Now what I am going to show you is instant transportation of myself from here to Earth and back. You’ll be able to view me on that visio screen telecasting from earth as I materialize there.”

“Let me just step in and show you the biggest miracle of your lifetimes. Mr. Grechen, if you’ll be kind enough to push the start button on the screen in front of you..”

“Very well…here I go” – said Senator Grechen as he pressed the start button.

And sure enough, the  body of Prof Fermi began to disappear heads down and started to appear on visio screen from earth as everyone in the room gasped.

As the onlookers watched in horror, the teleportation suddenly stopped as the waist down body of Prof Fermi lay in front of them. The assistant feverishly pressed some buttons to continue the teleportation mumbling the choicest words.

“What the hell just happened?”  Asked Mooney looking at motionless torso of Prof Fermi on visio screen

“Something what I feared the most” – sighed the assistant and read a note from the machine screen

“Windows 30 ’95 error. File not found. Please format your hard drive and reinstall your OS.”


Hi All,
This was written on a bit lighter note on the April Fool’s day. Please drop a comment and share it if you liked it!



  1. I think u have taken fool's day really seriously!

  2. Hummm ... I should have known it .... at least should have learnt from morning experience!!

  3. Took my breath away...nicely written dude.
    Keep it going.